Mindset practices to prepare for childbirth

As pregnant mamas, we often spend a great deal of time preparing our bodies for the birth experience— but what about our minds? Our Western perspective often portrays the mind and body as two separate organisms and we sometimes lose sight of the fact that they are deeply and profoundly interwoven as one.

Many of us have learned that our thoughts cannot be trusted which only widens the disconnect between the mind and body. Through my work, specifically with mindset, I have come to lean on somatic practices, stemming from the Greek word soma, to help honor the signals that the body sends to help us access information about experiences we may have had or may be anticipating.

Somatic work helps us sit with and integrate our body signals and thoughts in order to decipher what we can learn in that moment.

If we’re able to think about mindset as the mind and body working together in tandem, let’s look at some of the thoughts women have associated with the birth process.

When many mamas think about giving birth, they are often filled with fear and dread. There may be fear associated with pain, the unknowns, what may go wrong, or feeling out of control.

As a therapist, it’s my desire to teach my clients to be mentally present for their birth experience rather than have their experiences hijacked. I want to help them notice the connection between mind and body, building in somatic practices that will prepare the mind for the birth process.

If you are experiencing fear and anxiety associated with giving birth, and you are feeling that in your body, you are not alone. Many of us fear the unknown and birth brings out in a person a need to surrender to the unknown. This can feel very scary to trust and let go.

I invite you to get curious about what it means to connect your mind and body, create space to feel this fear, move through it into healing, and ultimately anticipate the arrival of your little one with feeling of empowerment and joy. Much of this work and transformation can happen with the help of a trusted therapist.

As we approach childbirth with a deeper understanding about the connectedness of the mind and body, there are a few practical ways that Somatic practices can support you.

Here are 3 somatic practices to help leverage your mindset for the birth process:

1. Create a sense of stability, presence, and safety through grounding techniques

Take a moment to place both feet on the floor. Wiggle your toes. Maybe even stomp your feet a few times if that feels good.
Go outside and put your feet in the actual grass or on the pavement.
Take 5 long, deep breaths in through your nose.
Bring your mind into the present moment by engaging your senses. Touch and item that’s near you and listen closely to your surroundings.

2. Find a system of support as you move through your feelings

You might find this support from your therapist, your partner, or a trusted friend. Keep in mind that so many of our feelings are tied to memories.

If you are sitting with a fearful thought, are you flooded with a memory from the past that is uncomfortable? Our past traumas and experiences can amplify our fear— and it might be helpful to remember that fear is a protective instinct meant to help keep us safe.

But, our fearful thoughts can also rob us of our joy. Let’s take a moment to move through some of these past memories in order to heal and move forward.

How old were you? If you were a young child, pause and go back to that place and meet your younger self in that moment to support, comfort, and remind her that she is not alone.
Acknowledge her emotions by saying phrases like, "this is hard", "you are scared", "this is stressful". Then remind her that she is not alone, other people feel this way too.
Where in your body are you feeling this fear? Do you notice it in your head? Your back? Does your breathing change? Can you remember a time when you felt like this before? Notice the specifics.

Have a therapist, partner, or friend support you as you need either through their words or touch as you move through the memory.
Then ask her what she needs to hear or do right now to express kindness to her needs. This can be as simple as placing a hand on your heart or saying, “May I allow kindness in.”.
Ask your partner to be present, hold your hand, and remind you that you are supported and your feelings are meaningful and worth understanding.
Let your body guide your motion. Do what intuitively moves you. Bring your hands to your chest, curl up in a ball, walk, or engage in another movement, if that feels good.

3. Practice getting YOUR needs met prior to childbirth

As moms and caregivers, we get accustomed to meeting the needs of everyone around us and often neglect ourselves. We operate out of exhaustion and depletion rather than focusing on preparing our minds and bodies for transition. As we connect our minds and bodies in preparation for childbirth, it’s vital that we meet our own needs first.

Create space to rest
Schedule a prenatal massage
If you notice yourself needing more engagement from your partner, ask for their attention or touch during this time
Spend time doing something you love. Are you a reader or an audiobook listener? I highly recommend The Politics of Trauma: Somatics, Healing, and Social Justice by Staci Haines
Practice Yoga

Learn more about Ayurveda, or the yoga practice of self-massage using oils
Eat nourishing foods
Play your favorite music and dance
Spend time in nature. Go for a walk on the beach or a hike in the mountains.

Not sure what you might need at this moment? You’re not alone! I’d suggest scheduling time with a therapist in order to help you learn more about what you need.

If you’re looking to go deeper in this area of somatics and mindset, I highly recommend a 1:1 or group setting where there is relational support to help to shift mind/body beliefs and tendencies. If you’d like to talk about working together, find out more here.

More than any one technique, I want you to know that you can be empowered for childbirth by mindfully connecting to your body, moving through feelings, and finding deep connection and support as you experience birth and transition to motherhood.